Life Transitions / Repeating Patterns

Sometimes you need help with situations or behavior in your life that repeat or just will not move.

On the other side of that coin, sometimes life gives unanticipated shocks you do not want–life changes and transitions.

Especially with help, we can grow through these processes, and into more than we were before them. It can be painfully frustrating and disappointing when a way of life begins to fail—or stays unchanged in a harmful, growth-reducing, or anxiety provoking way. On the other hand, a loss of previous lifestyle can be disorienting, with some temporary loss of identity or meaning. Both situations can lead to regret, grief, resentment, anger, guilt, or shame.

Sometimes life imposes on us more than usual

  • Goals can change over time.
  • Health crises can lead to changes in personality or relationship.
  • Financial or other fortunes can change.
  • Major societal events can be intense stressors.
  • The balance in work / home / social life can change.
  • Children, infidelity, family conflicts, or aging loved ones can cause situations that are hard to accept and resolve.

Also, sometimes we cannot seem to get unstuck, to move on and into life:

  • This is sometimes referred to as ‘failure to launch’.
  • However, the stuck state can be for other reasons–
    • Repeating anxieties or emotional conflicts that feel relieved by repeating routines
    • Substance use problems
    • Recurrent relationship themes
    • You may not realize why you cannot move along in life, but you would like to find out
    • Fear of making any decision final.
    • Feeling too sad, pessimistic, or unmotivated to make a move.

Individualized work on managing life changes or getting repeatedly stuck involves:

  • Support for, and fresh thinking about, coping with a life change
  • New perspectives and methods for dealing with repeating thoughts, feelings, and behavior
  • Managing anxiety when trying to dissolve or change repeating, stagnant patterns
  • Managing shocks
  • Making room for new thoughts, feelings, behavior, actions, pursuits
  • Improving the effectiveness of your responses to events and conditions
  • Properly grieving losses of people, activities, self-images, or goals
  • Cultivating compassion and forgiveness for yourself and others

Dr. Chris Michael on growth through life transitions and changesIf you are looking for individual psychotherapy to manage ongoing troubles, gradual changes, or sudden changes in your life, goals, meaning, or satisfaction, you do not have to be stuck in grief or frustration.

Call or secure email me to arrange a free, 15-minute telephone consultation.

For more on my therapy style, see here and here. For a page about telehealth / online therapy go here.